Thank God for Unanswered Prayers

December 28, 2018 at 12:10 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Thank God for unanswered prayers

Yes, it was thirty years ago..
I prayed and prayed and prayed
somethings broken would be fixed.
My heart, my mind, my life broken.
Shattered pieces on the ground.
My prayers went unanswered 
Or so I thought. 

Nothing was fixed to the way it was.
Romans 8:28 seemed to mock me.
“All things work together for good”?
Another mocking verse 1 Thes 5:18, 
“In everything give thanks” Really?
Written as a universal command
Read as a very personal beaconing. 
I began giving thanks for things 
Slowly lifting my eyes to The Giver.
Prayers for fixing it to the way it was
Diminished first out of hopelessness 
Then slowly out of surrender to Him.

How to move forward still broken?
Another verse was highlighted 
“For we are God’s workmanship 
Recreated in Christ Jesus
To do those good works 
Which He prepared for us to do.”
My works was to be a whole mom,
A loving mom, tho still fragile mom.
My other good works was to finish 
School that was almost completed.
“I have clients for you to counsel.”
To fulfill His purpose for me. 

Wondering how my fragile mess
Could possibly ever help anyone. 
Nouwen’s “The Wounded Healer”
Opened understanding as to how 
My shattered pieces on the ground,
My partially healed brokenness and
My slowly strengthening fragility 
Could become a healing testimony 
When placed in His hands. 

In addition to thanksgiving, 
In addition to surrendering and
In addition to a purposeful calling 
A release of bitterness was needed:
Bitterness toward ones who broke,
Bitterness to the One Who allowed,
Bitterness even directed at myself.
Anger needs more than releasing.
Bitterness needs conversion into 
Forgiveness to give radical renewal. 
Over time, forgiving all involved and 
Choosing also to bless, I was given 
 “Freedom thru Forgiveness”

Love isn’t love til you give it away.
Forgiveness isn’t Freedom if kept.
The testimony of forgiveness, 
I was told, would defeat the enemy.
The testimony of forgiveness 
I believe Glorifies God the Forgiver, 
Furthermore it encourages believers. 
Believers here and believers far,
Across cultures and languages,
Find Freedom thru Forgiveness, too. 

Isaiah 50:4  my personal life verse
“The Lord God hath given me
The tongue of the learned,
That I should know how to speak 
A word in season 
To him who is weary: 
He wakeneth morning by morning,
He wakeneth mine ear 
To hear as the learned.”
Wisdom, to speak a word
In season to him who is weary
Is not from an advanced degree,
Is not from scripture knowledge,
Is not from chronological age. 
It is from listening to The LORD 
Morning after morning as 
He whispers wisdom into my heart.
It is a still mystery how challenging 
Consistency in listening remains. 
So I will persevere in starting over

Jim Wilder gave a new perspective 
On Ephesians 2:10 my paraphrase:
“For we are God’s poetry
Recreated in Christ Jesus 
So we rhyme His thoughts and thus
Know how to rhyme His actions
Which He has prepared for us.
Counseling has become discipling. 
Teaching them to obey everything:
Believing, loving, trusting, following, 
Forgiving, blessing, encouraging,
Praying, listening, discerning, and
Rhyming to walk in their calling. 

Romans 8:28 understood with 29
All things work together for good.
The good being defined as being
Conformed to the image of Christ.
Then it becomes a known and felt
Truth: It is not I who lives
But Christ Who lives within me.
It is not my thoughts 
But rhyming His thoughts.
It is not my actions
But rhyming His actions.
It is not my heart 
But beating in unison with His. 
Thanking Him in all things, including 

Thirty years of unanswered prayers. 

Things are not the way I planned. 
Nor the way I hoped or dreamed. 
The more and more surrendered 
The more I become conformed 
To His image with in me. 

Day by Day Day by Day
Oh Dear LORD three things I pray
To see Thee more clearly
Love Thee more dearly
Follow Thee more nearly
Day by Day by Day….

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